Cook's Journal

Thanks for the links. OF all the guys I know, and I consider many to be very engaged with their kids, only three ever stayed home with kids, and one of those was only home for three months under Family Leave Act. Being a father is so important. In the criminal justice system we see exactly what lack of engagement by the father means to kids right now. I would be proud of my son if he decided to be a stay-at-home dad. His dad would never have done it and I consider him to be a good dad.

I was blessed with a father who never put anything else in importance above the family. We had our proble,s, and when I was a young teenager I thought he was too strict and overprotective, and he had a temper. But he's gone now and I hardly think about all that. My favorite thing about him was that we could just sit and watch movies together, or go fishing and float around in a boat all day, or sit around the kitchen table at night joking around. He was very laid back and never in a hurry to do something else "more important" than being with his kids and grandchildren.

In hindsight, it's great to have a Dad you can take for granted, knowing he's always going to be there. I know alot of kids miss out on that, so I feel very lucky.

My own husband is a great father - and we never call the time he has spent with the kids "babysitting," even when they were babies! He always wished he could have taken more time off from work when they were little, and felt sad to leave the house in the morning! He could easily have been Mr. Mom, and whenever I've been ill or just tired, he can easily play both roles. Actually, being a Mom or Dad is pretty much the same - the kids view it differently sometimes, but it's all about being there, cooking the food, driving the car, throwing the ball, and making someone do their homework. It's boring at times and that's why some people think it's unrewarding, but it's a long-term investment that pays off over 20 years.

We have one child who just graduated from high school (Big Yay!) and he's headed for college in the fall. Tomorrow our daughter takes the Law School Exam! Our youngest is just in 7th grade, so we have alot of years to go before our job as parents is done. I know their Dad is never going to let them down, because he never has, so I feel really lucky about that.